I'm a mom, and I blog, but I wouldn’t call myself a “mom blogger”.
About three years ago, a friend of mine shared a little secret with me. Her secret? She had started a blog. (I vaguely remembered another friend, several years prior to that, telling me the same thing, although I believe she had referred to hers as a website.) In any case, I did an internal roll of the eyes and tuned her out. I tried to put on my best listening face, but I’m sure the fuzzy glazed look in my eyes was all too obvious, because my dear friend never brought up her blog again. Who knew that a few years later I would start my own (maybe my blog should be named “Humbling…me” rather than “Simplifying…me”)?
In any case, one statement that stuck with me from our brief “blogging” conversation was that through her blog she had discovered an entirely new culture of people out there in the web-o-sphere. Blogging was more than just writing and pasting pictures on a website, but was an actual way of life for multitudes of people - specifically, moms.
After doing this blogging thing for almost a year, I’m beginning to see what my friend was talking about: the culture of the mom blogger. I’ll be very frank here: as much as I enjoy writing and pouring out from both deep and shallow ends of this brain pool, I don’t see myself as a blogger, and I often feel that I am experiencing a type of culture shock.
Growing up in Kenya, I was an American living in Africa. With as much exposure I had to the culture of that country, I was never a Kenyan. When we returned to the States, my homeland, I could relate to a small degree with peers my age, but felt like a duck out of water 90% of the time.
When I moved to France, I really wanted to immerse myself in the culture. I wanted to become as French as I possibly could without becoming weird. I did well my first six months, diligently working on language skills and French etiquette. Then, one day I woke up, looked in the mirror at my American frame, tired eyes and greasy hair (I had been asked to refrain from showering every day as it was seen as a waste of water…not kidding here!), and realized I was French-fried. I’d had it. I was done with stinky armpits and unmanageable hair. I was sick and tired of sitting down to dinner at eight or nine o’clock at night, only to spend the following thirty minutes talking about the food rather than eating the food (can we dig in already…I’m starving!). As much as I wanted to be European chic, it just wasn’t in me. I came to grips with my American/African/wanna-be-European-ness and decided to be myself: wearing GAP, shaving my legs, and washing my hair every day.
Yet, here I am again, feeling like a duck out of water. In my pursuit of chasing the blog dream, I have been confronted with the realization that - unlike a large percentage of mom bloggers - I don’t home school; I don’t have 10+ kids (that might be a slight exaggeration, but not too far from the truth); I don’t have a home business; I’m not frugal (although I’m growing in that area); and my internet proficiency goes as far as “cut, paste, e-mail and send”. I blog to write. That’s it.
I see the importance of networking, but I find myself unable to relate to all these mom bloggers out there. (Twitter is going to be my undoing for certain!) There are groups and lingo, hashtags and conferences and multiple posts uploaded all day long, and I don’t have the time to read, comment, follow, carpool, manage children, cook dinner, do ministry prep, keep a house clean and a hubby contented all at the same time. I wonder…are these women wearing their computers in a baby sling so that they can tweet every other minute while searching for “hot deals” and recipes online, blog about their lives, while changing diapers, teaching arithmetic and producing Martha Stuart-like snacks to their wee-ones?
Before I burn any bridges and hurt feelings, let me stop right here. It may seem that these women and I share little to no common ground. I have three kids, and I feel like I’m managing Noah’s ark. My children go to school outside the home. My husband is a pastor, and I feel immensely blessed to partner with him in this calling. My cooking skills leave much to be desired, but as my hubby puts it, “Hey, I’m not complaining because I didn’t have to make it. It’s food. That’s all that counts.” (Thumbs up to the best and skinniest man in the whole world!) I abhor doing crafts (too messy for me), and I’m not all that thrifty. Still, I do believe I share something special with all of the supermom-bloggers out there. We are kindred in our desire to raise responsible children, to love and support our husbands, pursue our passions, steward our money wisely, and reach out to other moms all over the country/world. Can we relate 100% with each other? No. But in matters of the heart and values that truly count- yes, we can.
This culture shock and my own insecurity might always be there, but at least I can appreciate the beauty around me, just as I learned to do with my life in France. I lived in France, but I wouldn’t call myself “French”. I'm a mom, and I blog, but I wouldn’t call myself a “mom blogger”. However, I am open and willing to learn, grow, and make some new friends in this vast, sub-culture world of the blogging mom.
What about you? Do you blog? Are you a blogging mom? Are you fully immersed in the blogging culture? Or are you like me…standing with one foot in and one foot out? Feel free to share your thoughts and opinions on the matter. We may actually have something in common!