Disclaimer: Read at your own risk. The following may, or may not, come across as a negative tirade of complaints from a super exhausted mother of three. The fact is it was, in fact, written by a tired and drained mother of three, but is not a true reflection of this tired mother of three’s character and mental stability. It is simply a brief glimpse into a brief moment of a mindless brain spill (something that happens every so often when a perfectly good mommy lacks a perfectly good nights rest).
I feel like the “Friday Scrooge”. I was just on Facebook, reading the Friday morning status updates of all my friends and felt a twinge of conviction that I do not share the same “Friday Feel-Good” sentiments. In fact, had I not read a dozen “TGIF’s” on Facebook, I wouldn’t have known what day it was. Of course, I can’t tell people this (and yet, here I am sharing freely with everyone and blogging about it too, which probably makes me look both pessimistic and contradictory). So, before I lie and post “Amy is ready to get her Friday on”, I have to stop and explain why I’m not quite in the “Friday Spirit”. It actually has nothing to do with Friday at all. The negativity I have stems from a deeper emotional and physical drain called “Summer Vacation”.
For the past two-and-a-half months my oldest has been out of school (and my middle child has been out of preschool). We have approximately three-and-a-half weeks left of summer break, and I’m literally counting down the days, hours, and minutes until I can shuffle Sydney out the door for the day! I had activities planned and prepared for the majority of June and July, but by the time August rolled around I was out of both creativity and money. This is not to imply weakness or lack of capability on my part. As I looked ahead to the hectic fall schedule we would soon be jumping into - the endless car trips to and from school, church, ballet lessons, playgroup, etc. - I surmised that a little August down time would be beneficial to us all me. I’m so excited, not just for Sydney to head off to school (and Brooklyn off to preschool), but also for fall in general. However, while trying to take care of myself in preparation for September, my intense and activity-driven firstborn is starting to climb the walls. Our needs are butting heads, and nobody is happy.
Don’t get me wrong. There have been quite a few wonderful highlights we’ve shared while the kids have been on break. We spent a couple of days at the coast: playing in the sand, making homemade pizzas, staying up late cuddling and watching movies into the wee hours of the night; we’ve gone swimming, participated in camps, had play dates and sleepovers. It’s been great. We’ve connected, made memories, and bonded as a family. However, August is here, and Mommy wants to slow down. Mommy doesn’t want to race to the park and pool multiple times a day. And I find it difficult to relish in “Friday” when there really isn’t anything that differentiates Friday from any other day on the calendar right now. Each day sort of blends in to the next, and I am so looking forward to the structure of school, the rigorous weekly schedule, and multiple activities for the simple reason that Friday will, once again, mean more to me than just another day.
As my need for rest and the need of my first grader to be active collide, I wonder if there is hope in getting through the final weeks of summer vacation. Alas, one survival skill I have learned is to give her lots and lots and lots of things to do. When I start to see that glimmer of misbehavior gleam in her eye, I give her a cleaning rag and send her off dusting. When that is done, I task her to sweep the floors downstairs (which she is doing at this very moment), organize her drawers and bedroom toys, etc, etc. If it means my desk being dusted daily for the next couple of weeks, rather than a whining and disruptive Sydney, I’m okay with that. I’m finding that her boredom could possibly work to my advantage, ie: a clean house.
So, here’s my honest to goodness Friday Facebook status update: “Amy is conjuring up multitudes of chores for her kids to do today to beat the Summer Break Blues”. Tomorrow may possibly look exactly the same, and the following day, and the day after that until finally all the World Wide Web will read, “Amy is celebrating the beginning of school and the return of TGIF” (“TGIF” meaning “Thank God Its Fall”), with a spotless house no less. Until that day comes, I will have to live with the feeling that I am nothing more than a “Friday Scrooge”, keeping that only to myself (and every one who reads my blog), while wearing the façade that I, too, love Fridays and the opportunity to spend another glorious and magical summer day with my children.
Oy vey – bring on fall!
By the way, I'm not the only one in this scenario who is longing for summer vacation to end. Daily, both of my girls ask me how many more days until school starts. We're all in this together.